Grampa's House

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We finally made it "Over The Hill" to see Tina's dad and her brother's family. They have been so supportive of our family as we have gone through the entire adoption process that we wish we could have had them meet Kai sooner, but all the same it was a great visit. Tina's dad is 87 years old and lives just down the street from her brother's family. We visit them a lot, but this last year has been busy and our usual summer visit this year was made by just Tina and our younger son Ben. Cam and I were both busy with work.

We talked about having them come visit us on Veteran's day, but felt it would just be too much. At that point we had only been home from China for about 5 weeks and having 5 people (and possibly 2 dogs) was just more than we felt Kai was ready for. To be honest it was definitely more than Tina and I were ready for! So we postponed until Christmas. We were concerned about driving over the mountains in winter. We have done it pretty regularly over the last few years, but earlier this fall the weather had been pretty bad and we were feeling uneasy about doing a six-plus hour drive with a toddler. Thankfully Tina's dad helped us with airline tickets as a Christmas gift.

So instead of a 6 or 7 hour drive we were looking at a 35 minute flight. The kicker: The drive from our home to SeaTac, parking the car, shuttle, checking bags, security check, etc... doorstep to doorstep was just over 6 hours travel time. You can't win.

All the same Kai was a real trooper. He travels easy and is amazingly agreeable. A couple of fun footnotes on the journey over include stopping for dinner on our way to the airport at the same restaurant we went to when we flew to China. The waitress we had the first time was working and remembered us, she was really excited to see Kai. Then at the airport we ran into our niece's boyfriend Max. He had to fly back to L.A. to play a gig. Our boys are friends with him and were a bit bummed they weren't going to see him this trip, so this gave them a chance for a short visit to catch up with one another.

During the visit Kai pretty much stuck to his schedule. We weren't hard and fast with it, but for the most part he just went with the flow. It amazes me to see how easily he adapts to change. Kai had fun playing with his cousins and meeting his Grandpa, Uncle Bill, Aunt Erin, Aunt Peggy, and cousins Caitlin and Hailey. We even had an outing to the antique carousel in Spokane. Stupid me forgot the digital camera on that outing - have to get those photos next trip.

I'm glad we waited to make the trip. Kai has had the time to settle in a bit here and feel more rooted, which I think helped him be confident and comfortable meeting new people.

It was funny when we got back to our house, he was very excited to see his home again. It made us wonder if he thought we were going to come back here or not?

Merry Christmas!

We hope you have a Very Merry Christmas!

This year, as I'm sure you can imagine, we are thankful for so very many things! Not the least of which is digital photography. This is one of 27 shots we took - you don't want to see the rest of them. It took longer than any of these three boys wanted to be in the silk outfits we bought in China, so we are also thankful for moments of cooperation on the part of teenagers and three year olds.

Fruit Ice Cream

Okay, we're guilty...
We let Hui-Hui watch TV.
As former Waldorf parents we are all too well informed regarding the evils of television and the threat it poses to the developing minds of young children.
But he likes it.
We limit it mostly to a bit of PBS children's programming and a few DVDs like "Big Bird in China". Well, there's been a few holiday specials too, he really seemed to enjoy "It's A Wonderful Life" and "The Christmas Story". We're hoping this doesn't leave him with much more permanent damage than what Tina and I sustained as kids.

But now we've found a program which we are trying to expose him to as much as possible: "Fruit Ice Cream"
We stumbled across this program on the local World Television Channel our cable provider carries. We look at this channel occasionally, and wonder if the program on at the time is in Mandarin, or Cantonese, or Korean? I wish I could tell, but I can't. So one morning a few weeks ago I was home with the flu. I was laying on the couch with a low-grade fever feeling miserable. So I'm flipping through the channels and there was this asian children's program on. Tina and I both keyed in on it and wondered aloud, "Is this Mandarin?" Then one of the little puppet characters came on screen appearing upset, and the Grandma character said to it "Mei guanxi" - "It's Okay" in Mandarin, one of the few Mandarin phrases we recognize!

I looked up the cable channel's website, (KBCB TV) and found their programming guide which confirmed the program is in Mandarin. There was some writing in Chinese, but it didn't say the name of the program in English, just "Mandarin Children's Program". I was really curious to learn more about the program but couldn't find anything on the web. So I emailed the Chinese writing to our friend Meimei who translated it for us. It's called "Fruit Ice Cream". With this knowledge I began Googling more aggressively and I finally found some good links.

The program fascinated me as it had a number of unusual qualities, the first being that the grandmotherly hostess is obviously a man. And while there are slick Sesame Street-like puppets, the pacing of the show is much more like Mister Roger's Neighborhood.

It turns out the program is an extremely popular one which is produced by Taiwan Public Television. It's been on the air for 6 years and there are over 800 episodes filmed so far. There is an interesting article about the show you can read by CLICKING HERE. The article mentions that the Grandmother character was partially inspired by Robin William's Mrs. Doubtfire, which is exactly who we thought of when we first saw her.
You can see the English webpage about the show on the Taiwan Public Television website by CLICKING HERE. This page has a short video clip of the show you can watch in Windows Media Player format. The episodes we are seeing air here at home are apparently older ones, and aren't quite as flashy as the one in the video clip online, and we don't get any English subtitles, but we are all enjoying them.

We feel it is very important to try and maintain Kai's Mandarin as best as possible. We feel this is one of the strongest ways we can preserve his cultural identity and provide him with a valuable tool and skill when he is older.

Children's Co-op Preschool

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Tina teaches the Two-Day Class at Children's Co-op Preschool. The co-op is a great program that's coordinated by the local community college. The program involves parents in the classroom and is a lot of fun. We enrolled both our older sons in this co-op when they were little and were very involved in the program. So much so, that Tina is now the teacher!

Her class meets on Tuesday and Thursday mornings, and is for 3 and 4 year olds. On the mornings Tina teaches I arranged my work schedule so I could be home with Kai. While it's great that we are able to always have one of us home with Kai, it's gotten a bit boring around the house for him; we don't have a very big social network of 3 year olds in our personal life these days.

One of the recommendations that came out of the early childhood development evaluation we had done for Kai was to get him into a preschool program. Rather than a remedial program, it was suggested that we try to find a program with "regular" kids. Hmmm... where could we possibly find such a program? While the answer seems obvious, it wasn't quite that easy. Even without his developmental delays and language issues, Kai isn't chronologically old enough to enroll in the co-op program. Still we thought this would be a great thing for him, so Tina discussed it with her facilitator from the community college and the co-op board parents. They agreed that this would be a good thing for him, so we decided to bring him to the class and have me there with him full time. I am not one of the regular working parents, I focus pretty much exclusively on Kai. I make sure he stays on task and doesn't disrupt the program for other parents. Also, as he isn't potty-trained I cover that area as necessary. We have been bringing him to co-op preschool now, since Thanksgiving and it's been wonderful! Kai loves being around other kids, and it gives him an opportunity to experience a wide variety of activities. I have been able to pretty much just be there to "spot" for him. initially he was pretty reserved, and kept to just the "sand" table and water table. But as of last week he has really started to break out and try some different things. He doesn't like to do the art projects as they are usually messy, and he is very apprehensive about anything that's sticky or gets your hands dirty. But he's playing in the kitchen and even with the playdough a bit!

So far we have been having him there just for the open activity portion of the day. We've tried the "circle" a few times, but he has a hard time focusing for that. Lunch is also difficult for him, so I have just taken him home for lunch, which means he also misses the "Big Room" (large motor play) and story/closing circle.

Tuesday was the last day of preschool before Christmas break and it was also Kai's birthday, so we decided to try having him stay for the whole day. This went VERY well! He enjoyed celebrating his birthday at circle - getting to wear the crown and sit in the special chair, etc. He didn't eat too much at lunch, but enough, and he got to stay for the Big Room.

I have to do less and less for him as he finds his comfort zone. Some of the things you would expect to be difficult for him are second nature; things like lining up to wash hands, sharing toys... yet these are the things he must have obviously dealt with daily at his home in China.

It's funny being in a preschool with Tina again. This has been a part of our life together since high school when we took an early childhood development class together. In college we worked together in a daycare, and as young parents we taught Sunday School together. For the last few years this has been Tina's exclusive domain, but now that we have Kai, we are both in it together again.

Tree Hunting

This is the third time the debate has been waged in this house...
Do we really want a Christmas Tree with a Three Year Old?
One year with Cam we actually had a table-top tree. Some might say we were wise. I think we were cowards. Ever since, we have always had a real Christmas tree. A few times we've bought them off of tree lots here in town, but we live in logging country. Out here in the rain shadow of the Cascade Mountains trees are for cutting down. So that's what we do.
Just a few minutes down the Mount Baker Highway from our home, Christmas Tree Farms are as thick as strip malls in California suburbia. We've been to a number of different farms over the years. This year we went to one called River's Edge, named for it's location along the Nooksack River. We chose this one because they have a wagon ride that takes you out to the trees. It was a really beautiful day, clear and not too cold. We got a bit of a late start as Ben worked today, and Cam took the ACT exam, but we made it to the tree farm before the sun dipped below the hills. Here's the view from where we were...

This has become such a big family tradition we don't even have to beg the teenagers to come along. They are Veteran Tree Hunters, and once we get to the tree farm we have to chase after Ben. Here they are with their young apprentice...

We rode the wagon out to the trees...

And began our search for the perfect tree.

We always go round and round on the selection process...

Mamma and Hui-Hui says, "Here it is!"

We all watched as...

Ben got ready to cut the tree.

Cameron helps steady it.

One reason the teenage boys may be so eager to come along is that we always visit Everybody's Store after we get our tree. This place is great! They have a deli sandwich bar that makes HUGE sandwiches, and if you come along and help cut the tree down you can have whatever you want.


We waited to bring the tree in the house until after Kai went to bed. He was quite surprised the next morning to find a tree in the livingroom! Tina and I put the lights on while he watched. This was very frustrating for him as he really wanted to "help". We managed to get it lit and called it at that until after his bedtime. It's been up and decorated for two days now, and he's been really good about leaving it alone. He likes to look at it, and has poked at it a bit, but it's not been a problem. He's too busy pushing the eject button on the CD changer.

Liam's Family is in China!

The Wickstroms are in Beijing and are on their way to get Liam!
You Can follow them on their adventure by reading their blog. Here is the link:

Bringing Liam Home

Liam is the little boy we met at the Social Welfare Institute in Baoding where Kai lived. The Wickstroms are adopting Liam through Children's House International, the agency we worked with to adopt Kai. We feel very fortunate that Kai and Liam will be able have a connection to one another as they grow up.

Children's Hospital

On Tuesday we went to Children's Hospital in Seattle. Our appointment was at 8:00 in the morning. MapQuest says it should take an hour and 33 minutes to get from our house to Children's Hospital. We left our house at 5:30 AM and barely made it. I do not envy Seattle commuters! We stopped in Marysville on our way to pick up my mom. She has been very involved in the care our nephew Devon has received at Children's Hospital so it was nice to have her along. We didn't have to think about driving directions or parking, etc.; made the trip MUCH easer.

This was a preliminary visit with Dr. Hanel to discuss Hui-Hui's hand. A physician's assistant gave Hui-Hui a general exam, which he was NOT happy about. He was quite distressed over being undressed in a clinical setting, but he calmed down by the time Dr. Hanel came in to see him.

I really liked Dr. Hanel. He has a calm, present, and gentle manner. He looked at Hui-Hui's hand and explained that we had a couple of options:
1) Do Nothing
2) Surgery

Before we went in, I was worried the doctor would immediately advocate for surgery, and as the physician's assistant looked at Hui-Hui, she said that he would probably want to straighten the wrist and build a thumb out of his forefinger. She said this as though it were a forgone conclusion. But When Dr. Hanel looked at him, he said it wasn't that obvious of a choice. If both of his hands were affected it would be a much more simple decision to want to create an opposable thumb. In that Hui-Hui's right hand is normal the need isn't as clear. Dr. Hanel also told us about a recent study of children who have had the procedure and ones who have not, and that the effect on functionality wasn't especially clear. For Hui-Hui, the decision to have this done is also complicated because his index finger doesn't flex properly, and the "quality" of this finger
effects the success of the operation.

The procedure of building a thumb out of a forefinger is called "pollicization". There is a good newspaper article which profiles Dr. Hanel and explains the procedure you can read HERE.

So we left the visit with an appointment to return in three months to discuss it again. Dr. Hanel asked us to think about what we want to do, but he did not give us a clear recommendation, as it's not a clear-cut case. He did have an OT come in and make a splint for Hui-Hui to wear on his hand at night. The splint holds his hand in an extended position to help stretch tendons and soft tissue. This will make surgery easier if we decide to go that route. Hui-Hui did not like getting the splint made. It wasn't really invasive, but the whole process was overwhelming for him. While we waited for the splint to be finished Gramma took Hui-Hui out of the exam room for a little walk around the hallways. This was very sweet, as it let her have an opportunity to connect with her new grandson, she was able to be there for him as a source of comfort in a stressful situation. Tina and I finished up with the OT then went to catch up with Hui-Hui and Gramma out in the lobby where they had gone to look at the fish tank. As we headed down the hall we could hear my Mom talking with someone and we saw a little asian girl standing in the lobby. It was Aimee Oppliger! We met Aimee's parents in Beijing, and Aimee in Guangzhou. They live near my sister outside of Marysville and adopted Aimee through our agency, CHI. Aimee was very interested in seeing Hui-Hui again, though Hui-Hui wasn't feeling very social after all he'd been through in the exam room. Aimee has fused fingers and was seeing Dr. Hanel as well. We were all just stunned that we had appointments on the very same morning!

Afterwards we went to Gramma's house for lunch. This was our first one-on-one visit with Gramma, and Hui-Hui really had a chance to connect with her.

Yes, that's Dori in the fish tank, Nemo was in there too.

Hui-Hui and Aimee meet again

Us with the Oppligers

At Gramma's House

Ho! Ho! Ho!

Waldorf Holiday Faire

On Saturday Tina and I took Hui-Hui to Whatcom Hills Waldorf School's Holiday Faire. This is the first time in eight years that we have not been parents of students at the school. It's funny how excited the two of us were. We have gone to this event since Cam was three, long before we were a part of the school community. Now we were returning as alumni parents and we were anxious to show Hui-Hui all the cool things! We have many good friends at the school we have not seen since our trip to China and we were excited about having them meet Hui-Hui for the first time.

Tina has brought Hui-Hui to the school a couple times before to visit the Roots & Wings store so this was not his first time there. Still, he seemed very apprehensive when we got there. Maybe we were too eager. We rushed to the Gnome Village and got in line.

We have been very cautious about taking Hui-Hui out very much. He goes to the store with us, and has been to some of the boys music events. These have included not only orchestra concerts, but brief visits to football half-time shows as well. However, visits to large social settings have been rare for these first two months. The few we have attended though have not been a problem for him. But this time he was not too sure about what was going on, and was very clingy. He wouldn't let Tina put him down, and was not interested in meeting Pocket-Man or digging for crystals in the Gnome Village. So we decided to slow down and break for lunch. We went to the "Wooden Spoon" cafe they host in Alia Hall and found a table. The place was packed and there was live music playing. We bought our lunch and had brought along custom Hui-Hui chow we knew he would eat.

Somehow, the noise and chaos of this room seemed to be just what he needed. After he ate, he got down from the table and started to wander in gradual circles away from us. He moved among the other tables then looped back to us as we visited with friends. Eventually he worked his way out of the hall and saw the swings on the upper playground; suddenly he seemed to be in his element. He wanted to swing and run across the snow-dusted courtyard.

We visited with old friends while he tugged on us to follow him. We wandered through the craft vendor displays at the rate of a distracted parent of a toddler - glancing briefly at treasures then chasing off after our little charge. It felt right. We whacked his schedule we have worked so hard to maintain, but it was a good thing.

The School Courtyard

Entrance to Gnome Village

A little leery of Gnomes

In The Gnomes Crystal Mine

Virtual Scrapbook

When we were in China I squirreled away a bunch of stuff to bring home for scrapbooking. Some of it was actually interesting and some of it was just stuff I kept for reasons I can't recall now. I have scanned some of it to put on the blog here. Many of these things have websites associated with them so they make a nice "on-line" scrapbook. I encourage you to click on these artifacts to see their links. If you do, please be patient and wait for the sites to load. They tend not to be the fastest sites, and Chinese web designers like lots of Flash animations and music.

This is a scan of a ticket stub for The Forbidden City. This was a fascinating place to see. They have a website too, which you can visit by clicking on the ticket...


How do you get around in China if you don't speak any Chinese? Most hotels have these handy cards you can show to the taxi driver, so you can always get back. The trick is getting to where you want to go first! Click on the images of these cards and you will go to the hotel's website. The English page for the Hebei Century Hotel doesn't work, but that actually makes sense based on our experience there!



PiyoPiyo and BoboHouse are brands of baby clothes and stuff that we bought in China for Kai. These are scans of packaging for things we bought. Both have cool websites you can see by clicking on the pictures...

Now I'm guessing that you probably recognize this package even if you can't read the writing on it. If you click on this picture you will go to the Chinese McDonald's website. It seems quite a bit flashier than the US site.

Hui-Hui's "Gotcha Day" was on Chinese Moon Festival Day. These are Moon Cake packages. The boxes contained individual cakes, each the size of a cupcake, but very heavy. These images may be upside down as my Chinese reading skills are non-exisistant. These link to the Wikipedia page on Moon Cakes

Messing With The Website Format...

If you tune in regularly you have probably noticed the general look of this site has changed a couple times recently. The program I use to create this website is an amazing little tool called RapidWeaver. If you use a Mac and want to publish a blog or a simple website, this is a great program. It's very inexpensive and very easy to use. Creating the custom page headers is a little tricky but I've gotten pretty quick at it. If you are keeping count, this is actually the fourth header to appear on the site.

The dragon graphic in the top right corner is a scan of a painting we had an artist do for us at The Yu Long Friendship Store near The Great Wall just outside of Beijing. The original painting is about 12" x 28" in size. Here's an image of the full painting.

The first three images are the letters: K A I made of birds and flowers. The last image of a flower, dragon, and mountains is a stylized representation of the Chinese character Kai:

We had this painting made the day before we got Kai, and didn't know we'd be calling him Hui-Hui, otherwise we probably would have had his full name painted. Unfortunately the painting took a bit of a beating during our travels and has some creases in it, so we haven't put it up on the wall. I think we will probably be able to get it smoothed out, but it will need to be framed for it to look right. Fortunately it did scan pretty nicely, and I like being able to use the graphic here on the website.

Note: now that it's December all the posts from November have been moved into the monthly archive available for viewing from the menu on the right.